Monday, May 18, 2009

Lover of my soul

The sermon today sent me into a state of contemplation. Indeed, I walked away inspired. I want to repent for my lackadaisical attitude towards the most important person of my life. He is the core of my whole being yet why do I hurt Him over and over again? I hear Him speaking to me, "Come, spend time with me. Talk to me in prayer." I realized now that they are not my thoughts. They are Your words to direct me to have a deeper relationship with You. I still remember one morning while I was in the shower and You showed me Proverbs 3:5-6,

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;

6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight. (NIV)

You are all-knowing and the verse really gave me comfort especially in this period of my life when I am all stressed out about college assignments.

What is this pain that I am feeling right now? Tears flow when I think about You, when I think of how much You love me. Even right now as I am typing this, I can't stop these tears from streaming down. Now I come into Your presence and I can see all my brokenness and shortcomings revealed clearly. I never realized that deep down, I was not whole. There's always a hole in me which no other happiness in the world could fill in. The answer to the hole is You. You always work wonders in ways I could not comprehend.

Realization on May 17th:

Lord, I am Your oracle and I believe that nothing could separate us. Not Satan, not the world. NOTHING! Yes, Pastor Angelina, I will not let the devil hold me back from Christ and thanks for your prayer today. You might not be reading this, but today, I have found myself falling in love with Him all over again in a way so different than before.

2 wrote a note:

pismayka said...

wow. God must've been so happy when He saw this. hehe

khairul said...

in the... shower?
the lord works in mysterious ways...